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Post by Andromeda Black on Apr 11, 2009 20:26:22 GMT -5
Andromeda wasn't really paying attention as she exited History of Magic. She hadn't really been paying attention for most of the class, though, so that was to be expected. She normally didn't daydream in class, usually she was all ears, even for Professor Binns, and she had some of the best notes in the class to prove it. But today, her heart wasn't in it. She couldn't focus on the ghost's words about random events that she had never cared for. She struggled to remember the topic, even, and that was a problem, because half the time in that class, it was something ehr parents had lectured her about over the years, and then she didn't have to worry about it. She sighed. She would have to ask someone else for their notes, if anyone else had them. It would mean running around for a good half hour, and that was something Andi really didn't feel like doing.
Andi didn't really even care, because she was distracted by much more important things than her grade right now. Her period was a day late. It wasn't something to be overly concerned about, something that wouldn't have bugged her before this summer, she kenw that, but she was scared because this summer had happened. It was a real possiblity that she could be pregnant, considering what had happened during the two weeks she had stayed at the Tonks. She tried to do the mental math, but her head hurt too much to even think.
She[couldn't be pregnant. Not because it was physically impossible, but because it would be impossible to deal with. She was Andromeda Black, for God's sake. Girls like her, good, smart, prefects didn't get pregnant. And she was a Black girl- heaven forbid that one of them get pregnant while they were still in school- they were supposed to be perfect. Not that her family would really care after last spring- they probably wouldn't be the least suprised. That was the real problem. She had absolutely no family anymore, except maybe Sirius, but he was no better off that she was. Pregnancy was the last thing she needed, a nightmare in her already frightening dream.
So you really couldn't blame Dromeda for not watching where she was going. She smacked into someone, and fell down. She picked herself up and offered a hand. I'm sorry," she said, and then she caught who she was talking to. She gasped in shock.
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Post by Narcissa Black on Apr 11, 2009 21:46:04 GMT -5
Narcissa on the other hand was cutting class. Her previous lesson had been a fiasco. Care of Magical Creatures was not her forte. Neither were half the classes she'd taken, but her mother had insisted she take things that would look good to men or be interesting to talk about; apparently men wanted their petite wives to care for slobbering, attacking awful little beasties that would make any proper woman faint, or cry. Cissa had been doing the latter during the last five minutes of class. Whatever the bug like little beast they'd been 'learning' about today had wound it's way into her hair and started pulling it had been awful. And she didn't have anyone to go to about it.
The nurse gave her lotion for her head to regrow what had ripped out but she was there for emotional help. Bellatrix didn't have emotions like most ladies, and she was hardly going to let the girls vieing for position as Queen Slytherine Bee know about her weaknesses involving biting, clawing creatures the side of her pinky. For the past 15 years of her life Cissa had always turned Andromeda- whether the older girl wanted to solve her problems or not. Andi had always been the smartest of the three, the most good hearted. Cissa was constantly ill as a Child and it was her Andi that was with her. But since the events over the past summer, Cissa new she couldn't. And she wouldn't; Andi had left them and betrayed them.
Didn't she know how she turned her back on the entire family? She could have ruined her and Bella; their reputations down the toilet in one swoop. She was a traitor; a blood traitor- the worst kind. But try as she might she couldn't say the nasty things Bella did. She couldn't stop referring to the girl as 'her sister' in stories. And she couldn't stay away from her, apparently.
Cissa looked down as she collided hard with Andi, stumbling back and falling down on her bum as she did so. She wiped at her eyes, tugging down her skirt and trying to right herself. She didn't want to have to talk to her. She couldn't say something mean. She was only all of her fifteen years; she'd never known cruelty enough to sharply reciprocate it.
“Sorry Drummi.” She said grabbing her back. “I mean. Andromeda.” She didn't know what to call her former sister, but this seemed to be the best as she stood slowly.
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Post by Andromeda Black on Apr 11, 2009 23:09:40 GMT -5
A flood of emotions swept over Andi, much strong than she expected. A small part of her brain reminded her that pregnant women were overemotional, but she pushed that thought aside a little too fast. She took a second to regain her compusre before she attacked the onslaught.
The first thing was suprise. Cissa must have been skipping class, considering there was no way that she would be in this hall this close to the end of the hour otherwise. It worried her, that Cissa was skipping classes, but the stubborn part of her said that it wasn't her concern, that it didn't matter anyway, Cissa wouldn't want to talk to her.
The second thing was fear. If Cissa found out the thoughts she was mulling over, Andi would be dead. There was no way to judge what Cissa would do with that type of information. In the old days, maybe she would have kept the secret, but now, Cissa was tpp much of a loose canon. It hurt Andi, more than it should, to think of her sister like that, to think of her as an enemy. Bella, sure, they had fought far too often for it to be a shock to her, but Cisssa? Andi always just wanted to wrap her arms around her and keep her safe from the crazy people. It hadn't worked, though; Cissa turned out just as spoiled as Bella, but she was still nice. Or had been, until they stopped talking.
Third was concern. She had heard the rumors, seen with her own eyes that Cissy wasn't exactly doing everything the smart way. But seeing her up close was much more revealing than from the Ravenclaw table when she wasn't supposed to be looking. She wanted to hug her little sister, say she was sorry, but she hadn't done anything wrong. She turned away, to avoid looking at Narcissa's face, and stared at the wall. It was really quiet interesting, she thought. The castle was so beautiful, even if it was drafty. All this happened it but a moment.
When Cissa spoke, she lost her resolve and turned back towards her. Hearing the slip, her old nickname, made her smile, though it was bittersweet, and she hid it when Narcissa restated her full name. Her eyes flickered to her sister's face, but she caught sight of Narcissa's head. She winced when she saw the hair missing from her sister's otherwise perfect scalp. She took a step forward and reached out a hand tentatively. "Cissy, what happened?" It was almost an automatic response, something she had done a thousand times before.
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Post by Narcissa Black on Apr 12, 2009 18:22:29 GMT -5
Narcissa fought back tears again; the amount of times she'd nearly succumbed to crying today was becoming ridicules. The young girl wanted to fling herself upon her elder -she'd always seemed years older to the younger girl; wise beyond her years in many but not all things- sister after relaying and cry about her day. It was hard to fight the need to seek comfort in the familiar shoulder of the brunette. Andi had always been strong like a statue; Bellatrix was just the opposite. A whirlwind of emotions all angry and desperate seeming.
“Chizpurfles!” She cried out, playing with the tailored sleeves on her robes as her lips and eyes became wobbly. “They attacked me! A whole infestation of them; I'd worn the head piece Aunt Walburga gave me and they- I mean my aunt Walburga.” She had to correct herself once again. Andromeda, her sister and mother had made very clear, was no longer a apart of their family. It was almost sad how 'clearly' stated things never stuck in her mind. Like the Andromeda fiasco. Or not wearing magical things to class.
“And they pulled and..and.” As tears started to leak from her the corners of her eyes she fought very, very hard to wrap her arms around Andi and move her soon to be coming sobs to the color of the other girl's robes. Where had Andi gotten her robes this year? It occurred to the fifteen year old just then that Andi really had nothing from their- her- family anymore. No more Holiday trips. No more explorations on the Black country estate. She bit her lip, keeping in the heightening emotions. She had to turn her mind to something else. But her mind didn't allow her to stray far enough away....
“And it's all your fault, Andi!” As the anger suddenly swept through her, she wiped at her eyes and stomped one foot down. Her mind had gone far past pity to the deeper waters of frustration and anger. She stamped the ground again; the small leather boots she wore spreading apart just slightly. Now, because of her former sister's recklessness she lost a playmate, memories, a confident. Their reputation would suffer- who'd associate with a family full of bloodtraitors? “Why couldn't you have listened to mother for once, instead of doing something traitorous and...ruinous! I hope you're happy! I hope you're happy now that you've ruined yourself forever!”
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Post by Andromeda Black on Apr 12, 2009 20:32:23 GMT -5
Andi took a step towards to her sister, her eyes staring at her sister's head. "Did you go to the Hosiptal Wing?" she examined the head again, and saw her answer. "Well, it looks clean." She surveyed the rest of her sister, checking for any other damage. Cissa was obviously distressed, but there didn't seem to be anything physically wrong with her. Andi raised her hand closer to Narcissa's face, but then she realized what she was doing and she put it down quickly.
"Oh, why didn't you listen to the rules? You know they wouldn't say that you can't do something if they didn't have a very good reason." Andi could never understand the way the Cissa didn't think the rules applied. But then, Cissa probably thought the same thing about her. The irony of that symmetry hit Andi, and she almost smiled, but she felt pulled in too many directions to do that.
Andi could see the emotion on her sister's face; she knew it well enough from all the times Cissy had come running to her for advice. What she couldn't understand was why she was so emotional. The attack was embaressing, sure, and it was ackward, but her hair would grow back. Surely Narcissa wasn't that vain to think that it was the end of the world. Andi was her sister, had seen her much worse over the years, so she shouldn't have been embaressed.
"What are you talking about? How is it my fault?" Andi asked, but then she realized that Cissa wasn't talking about the attack anymore. That wasn't the problem at all. She looked at her sister, wondering how she could think that it was Andi's fault. She couldn't help the person she liked anymore than Cissa could, and if the rumors were true, Cissa liked dangerous creatures indeed- ones like Lucius Malfoy. "I was miserable every moment I spent trying to make Mom look good. I'm not a traitor, not to myself."
She bit her lip, thinking about the other accusation. "I may be ruined, but only in a world were I felt like a caged bird. I am willing to pay the price." She was partially lying- she did miss the money. She was never a shopper, but she missed not worrying about the little things. And she missed her sisters. Even now, when she was fighting with Cissa, she was still so glad to see her, she could barely contain it. She was such a mess.
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Post by Narcissa Black on Apr 13, 2009 16:36:07 GMT -5
Narcissa cringed as her sister started to go through her hair with a rough precision any mediwitch would be proud to posses. She nodded meekly, pulling the small bottle from her bag and showing it to Andi- like a small child showing proof that they'd brushed their teeth. It was a particularly nasty smelling concoction but the witch ruling roost over the infirmary assured her that three applications half and hour apart would salvage and restore the quantity and quality of her locks. But for the next two hours Narcissa would have to spend time hiding the bald patches from passersby, friends, and most notably boys. It was embarrassing. She almost, at times, envied less noticeable girls. Her family's standing drew enough attention amongst her peers, but with recent events with Andi attention was increased. The new attention was far less wanted and enjoyable.
She pouted slightly, feeling as any girl would- reprimanded by and elder sister. Narcissa had an inability to listen when she was told something if she didn't find it important at the time. It hadn't occurred to her why she wouldn't be allowed to wear the charmed headband- it had only minor spells to protect her against clumsiness and things of that sort. Her aunt always worried that she might fall and make a fool of herself; especially after she'd taken a tumble down the stairs during one of Walburga's holiday dinners. “They didn't tell me the reason so I assumed it simply wasn't of any value..” She said, pocketing the potion bottle and moving her hairs to her hair to play with the strands; perhaps she could find a way to hide the new spots and the high hairline she hid on a daily basis. Her mother had spent a good amount of Cissa's younger years pulling her thin hair into high updos- leaving her hair line thing and high.
“It's all your fault! Everything since you left is your fault!” She said firmly, shaking her head as she bit her lip firmly. Narcissa could, if illogically, trace every negative thing that had happened to her as of late to Andi's departure. As the girl continued, Narcissa's eyes darkened. She positively glowered at the other girl. Narcissa considered herself a very evenly tempered girl. When she did feel anger and frustration she preferred to express herself in sharp, stinging, sarcastic comments rather then caustic, loud verbal abuse. However, her dearly -and formerly- beloved sisters brought out strong emotions. Andi usually brought out more living -if extreme- emotions while Bella brought out the worst in her. But today, the emotions she held about her sisters betrayal bubbled over like a forgotten cauldron.
“You, you, you! It's always about you and how you're feeling. You were miserable! You're willing to pay the damn price. It isn't all about you, Andromeda!” She said gripping the other girl's upper arms. “You left me alone forever! Who will be there for me when Bella gets into one of her rages? Who will I turn to for guidance and company?” She demanded, one tear sliding down her cheek. “And while you pay a price for your so called freedom, who price will I pay for you endangering the level of our -my!- family in society? Who will marry her a girl with a filthy sister? People always talk- even years after. Who will suffer Bellatrix's temper because of you? You know how she is! Your price is inconsequential.”
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Post by Andromeda Black on Apr 14, 2009 17:03:20 GMT -5
Andi chuckled. "Cissy, did you even read your textbook?" She shook her head. Narcissa's nickname, Cissy, was so close to the word "sissy", "sis"- sister. Andi had never realized that before. It felt odd, considering Cissy's own words painted Andi as anything but. She couldn't stop thinking the word, though, couldn't help it. Narcissa was her sister- how could Andi see her as anything else when she was like this? Andi wished that they were both younger, when that was all that mattered. "You have to trust that people make decisions that are in your best interest," Andi said, and then almost laughed. Hadn't her mother told her the same thing a million times? It never worked with her, just like it would never work with Narcissa now. The two of them weren't the headstrong ones, that title belonged all to Bella, but they could be determined.
"What do you mean, everything? Did something happen? If something had happened to Cissa, Andi didn't know if she could forgive herself. It wasn't easy, despite what everyone thought, when she stood there and decided that enough was enough. The look on her mother's face... It may have looked easy, to the outside, but Andi still wondered if she made the right choice. No, she knew that she had made the right choice, she just wasn't sure if she had expressed that choice the wrong way. Maybe if she had been honest, it would have- no. This was the way it had to be. Andi knew that. But if something happened to her sisters because of what she did, Andi wasn't sure if she could forgive herself. But maybe Narcissa was exaggerating. It wasn't the first time. Andi took a deep breath. Narcissa and Bellatrix were going to be fine. They were going to be better than that. They would get whatever they wanted- the rich, pure blood husbands, the cute kids, the happy families. Andi struggled to remember that when she looked at her sister's face.
Andi ran her fingers through her hair, trying to think how she could make the decision seem less selfish. "I can't explain it, Narcissa. You just have to trust me, someday you're going to do something, do it not because it's what's expected of you, or not because it's the thing that you were told to do, but because you love somebody, and you can't stand to see them hurt. When that happens, you'll understand what I am saying, I promise. She sighed. It was feeble, but she couldn't think of anything else.
"Bella loves you, even if she doesn't always show it." Or ever show it, Andi mused, but that was beside her point. "She won't hurt you, not on purpose." She laughed bitterly. "And the fact that people still talk to you is one of the many indicators that I didn't cause any problems with your social status. Face it, alomst no one knew I was your sister, and of those who did, half of them are our relatives. It was easy to drop me like a boiling potion. You and Bella will be fine- better than if I had stayed. Before, our parents had to admit that I exsisted, but now that can pretend I never was that I was just a mistake to blasted off the tree. They don't have to explain, to finance, to love the Ravenclaw girl." They must have brought out the champagne when they got home that day, she thought, and not for the first time.
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Post by Narcissa Black on Apr 19, 2009 20:20:25 GMT -5
“How am I supposed to know if they have my best interests at heart? All the want to do is be paid for their lousy job teaching lousy mudbloods and go home to their lousy little house. They could care less about me.” She said crossing her arms and shaking what was left of her short blonde hair against her shoulders. “At least I know when Mama tells me to do certain things I know it's because she doesn't want me to end up in a lousy position with a lousy husband and a lousy life. Why can't you know that too?” She added the last sentence softly, uncrossing her arms and looking towards the ground. Andi seemingly never understood why she was dressed up like a doll and taken to the best parties; parties even Narcissa hadn't the privilege of attending at fifteen.
“You and your stupid decision happened!” She spat out through her teeth, her fists clenching at her sides. There had been drinking when Andi had been caught with the boy- but not the kind meant for celebration. Their mother had sobbed about her nerves for an hour- it was their Aunt who'd blasted the sprawling family tree; Walburga was always intimidating- and had turned to their father's liquor cabinet for comfort. Bella had tugged at the youngest girl's hair for her crying and bemoaning the loss of her sister. The fact her sister no longer had anything barring her use of magic against her was the only thing that made Cissa finally bite her tongue and keep the sobs to the privacy of her own room. Cygnus' disappointment was clear in his eyes- that had been the worst part.
Her sister was attempting to defend her actions, but it wasn't possible to do so in Narcissa's mind. “I will never get into a position of betraying my family and ancestry. What's expected of me will to be to honor those things. I will marry a husband who's dedicated to the Cause-,” a rapid number of young men were joining the equally rapidly growing group of Death Eaters. “- and I will support him and both of our families. Just like I was raised to do. Because I love them.” Her bottom lip jutted out in determination, her eyebrows furrowing just slightly.
“You don't know anything about the problems, Andi!” She said stamping her food childishly, her lofty, angry voice once again overwhelmed with emotion. Her eyes began to water yet again. “I don't want to forget my sister! I don't want to be Bella's little victim. She's learning unforgivables, I swear! She's wicked to me. I don't want to be alone yet, I'm not ready. Mama's nerves had left her bedridden all summer and Papa is never around. I don't want to loose you Andi. Just say you're sorry. We can pretend this never happened. We can say someone used one of those unforgivables on you and made you kiss the mudblood! You can come home and everything will be back to normal.” Her eyes filled with water, her bottom lip loosing its countenance and becoming quite a wibbly mess. [/blockquote]
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Post by Andromeda Black on Apr 20, 2009 20:09:24 GMT -5
Dromeda knew better than to try and argue with Narcissa's assumptions. It would just lead to a bigger fight, and she was already getting a headache as it was. "Look at it this way- if they had intentionally forgotten the information, they know they would have had the force of all the Black family behind them." Andi chuckled lightly. "Cissy, I don't think that your idea of lousy is the same as mine. That's why Mum and I fight." Fought, past tense," she tacked on in her head. The didn't speak anymore.
Do you know the people that you love?" Andi asked, rolling up the sleeve of her blue sweater. The white mark on her wrist stuck out as she flexed it. "Daddy gave me this. His own daughter. How can I believe that he loves me? How can you believe that they don't use you for anything more than a doll? Or what about Aunt Wallburga? You wear that headband, evne when it gets you hurt, without thinking about what she did to her own son. To me." She ran her fingers through her hair in frustration. "And how can you find the Dark Lord in the right if he is killing people? People are dying, not because they deserve it, but because they were born. How can you turn a blind eye to that?" She shook her head, trying to understand it. That was the thing that had planted the doubt in her head, all those years ago. "Do you want to marry a murderer? That's what Mum and Dad want, really."
"Cissy, wll you ever be ready to be alone? That's not supposed to happen. None of this is supposed to happen! We were supposed to grow old together, but things never work out the way we plan, they work out the way that we chose them to be. You have chosen to exclude me, not Mum or Dad or me. It's in your power, no one else." I can't control you, Andi thought, and no one else can either if you don't let them, don't you see, Cissa? Andi's heart was breaking, but she couldn't do anything about it. Or could she?
Kiss the Mudblood, Andi thought. This was all over a kiss. The whole thing, the row, the loneliness on both sides, the fight, was because of a kiss. Her eyes flicked without thought to her stomach. A kiss, she thought. If she really was pregnant, there would be no turning back. Andi thought about Teddy. Even if she wasn't pregnant, she wasn't sure if she wanted to say goodbye to him. It was so hard! Thinking of her family as the enemy from the havens of the Ravenclaw tower was easy; it was easy to think that way when she was shopping and she couldn't find any money, or when she got a Howler. But here, in front of Cissa, she found her resolve wavering like a candle's flame. It was amazing how much she could force herself to forget to survive, but maybe more amazing how much she wanted what Cissa was talking about. It was so tempting. "I wish it was easy," she whsipered, "I wish there was a way to make everythin okay." She almost said normal, like Narcissa had, but she knew better. As Harding had said, we cannot return to normalcy.
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Post by Narcissa Black on May 10, 2009 17:42:38 GMT -5
Narcissa reached up, gingerly pressing the pads of her finger tips against the gently raising stubble on her brutally assaulted scalp. A sigh of relief left her lips mixing with a groan; yes, it was indeed growing again but by the time she looked presentable it would be past supper. She'd have to avoid the Great Hall and the common room tonight. Even a well placed hair ribbon wouldn't cover this in time. She longed, for a moment, for both of her sister's darker, thicker hair. She never had before, finding it unruly and unfeminine. Of course, it would be easier to cover up a gap of hairless scalp with it. She let out another sigh.
“As much as Mother disagrees you can't intentionally forget something.” She said snorting, her mood lightening for only a few moments. “If you do anything intentionally you can still be caught.” She said knowingly, echoing words she had heard from one of her parents at some time or other. As the conversation veneered back to their family, the raised spike in her mood quickly fell again.
“Of course it is, Andi.” She said shaking her head. “You like nice things; not as much as me, of course. But more then Bella. You wouldn't want to marry anyone who couldn't buy those bright blue silk robes you adore. I was going to buy them for Birthday this year...you looked at them so much last year, in the shops.”
Her head shaking stilled and she glared slightly at her elder sister. “He told you to stop going into Muggle London. He told you so many times I can't even remember! You deserved to be punished and you know it. You should have learned!”She said, her tone low, quick, and dangerous just then. “Aunt Walburga bought it for me because she loves me. Sirius was removed because no one could love him. He's worse then you. This whole Muggle loving nonsense. Being born is enough, Andi. They don't even deserve to be born. It's not murder; it's relieving the Wizarding World of vermin.”
“No, Andi. You chose to exclude yourself. You chose to not be apart of my, and my family's ,life.” She whipped at her eyes, adjusting the bag on her shoulder and trying to push past the overwhelming sadness spreading in her chest. She was angry, she was frustrated, there was no room for depression. Because her sister couldn't control herself, because her sister didn't care she had to suffer; Narcissa hated suffering.
However, as Narcissa watched her sister's eyes spill emotion into her own, she bit her lip as the melancholy mood swept over her again. She swallowed, rubbing the sole of her shoe against the stone floor. “Of course it's that easy. Of course you can fix it. Just...just say your sorry.” She said using the edge of her sweater to wipe at her eyes, careful not to smudge the makeup she wore. “Father will be angry. Bella will be livid. But mummy will except anything you say. We can still go to Paris next holiday. Everything will be alright. It was just a stupid kiss.”
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Post by Andromeda Black on May 12, 2009 18:45:06 GMT -5
Maybe Narcissa didn't mean to accuse Andromeda with her words, but that was how Andi took it. Like from the moment that Andi started dating Ted, she was bound to be caught. Maybe it had been inevitable, but Andi thought she had kept it pretty secret for awhile there. She might have been able to keep it going, if only that day hadn’t happened…
The bright blue robes. They had been so gorgeous, and Andi hadn’t exactly been subtle in her coveting of them. The color was perfect, and oh, she had wanted them so much. She didn’t want to spend the money on herself, not when there were books and quills and practical things to buy. It was just as well that she hadn’t bought them, because that was more money for her to spend this year on things that she really needed. She had forgotten them, but her sister’s words brought it all back. Dromeda tried to pretend that she wasn’t materialistic, and most of the time, she wasn’t, but she was a teenage girl, as much as she hated to admit it. And the fact that Narcissa would have bought her them? Andi got a little choked up. She had to be pregnant, that kind of thing was not worth crying for. She wiped her sleeve against her face to hide the one tear. ”I’ve changed, Cissy. Money won’t have anything to do with who I marry.” What Andi didn’t say was that she would probably end up supporting herself, so she would be able to- or not be able to- buy robes based on what she herself had.
”I deserved it? I deserved to be scarred? I’ve never been the pretty one, Narcissa, that’s always been you. But he actually aimed to hurt me, to give be a reminder of what he could do.” Narcissa didn’t get it; she was too far indoctrined to see the things that were happening behind the curtain, as that Muggle movie Andi had once seen had said. Or it had been something like that, but that wasn’t the point.
"There are some that think that you-our kind are the problem that the world needs to be rid of. It's all about tolerance, Cissa, balance. You don't have to like them; but that doesn't mean that they can't live because it inconviences you." Andi had long given up trying to get her family to actually be friends with people that they deemed less than worthy. But this was the whole problem with the pureblood mentality- they didn't talk to people who were different. Then they didn't talk to people who thought that those people were okay. Then they had kids, and they repeated the process. After centuries of that, was it any wonder little fifteen year old girls were okay with murder? In that context, Dromeda was the crazy one, the odd one.
Andi shook her head in frustration. "I made choices, sure, that led to some of my current problems, and yes, most of my problems are direct results of what I have done, but don't you see? If you are going to recognize my choices that led to this mess, then you have to see the choices you have made, leading to your situation! You're fifteen, with no mental problems, despite all the inbreeding. You have to take control of your own life, Cissa! Otherwise, you're going to live under Bella and Mom and Dad until you graduate, then Bella and some pureblood husband and the Dark Lord when you grow older!" It was easier to yell at Narcissa than it was to beg her sister to love her. It was very tempting, just to break out into tears, and give in; she had to keep that thought out of her mind, or she might go insane.
Andi flinched. Why did she have to keep saying that? It was just a stupid kiss! The phrase made her want to stamp her foot again, but Andi settled for running her fingers through her hair. It's not exactly just a kiss," she muttered under her breath. They way Narcissa said things like that; it made her feel like a slut, like she didn't deserve her family. But that was what Narcissa believed, what she had be told to believe.
And she couldn't really blame Narcissa for wanting to have her family all happy. When Sirius had left, Andi had been weak for a moment- she had written him a three page letter on why he should come back. But then two things happened- she realized that most of her reasons were pretty selfish, and her mother yelled at her for something small about the same time. It hit her- she hated the constant lectures, the constant fights. Maybe it got to be too much. But Andi reWizarded how that had felt- that moment where you think that everything can go back to normal, that everything can be sane again. But it doesn't happen like that.
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Post by Narcissa Black on Nov 2, 2009 17:48:29 GMT -5
“ But. But. But Andi…” She began, cheeks flushing, eyebrows knitted together. Her eyes went glassy and her bottom lip jutted out just so- a tell tale sign Narcissa was either about to cry of thoroughly confused. And in this case, it was both. “How will you live? Who will take care of you?” She asked, her voice rising and octave or two as she made no attempt to hide her surprise, worry, or perplexity. Narcissa, having grown up under her father’s constant attention and with the expectation of being a young bride had never let it occur to her that anyone she knew would need to find other ways of safety, food, shelter, love, and attention. Of course she wasn’t stupid. She knew poor people did it, and she knew people in books did it, but she couldn’t picture her own sister doing such things. Would the same girl who’d played tea-time with dolls and unciorns one day be found serving drinks to grubby men in a pub? Would the pretty sister in front of her let herself become work worn and homely trying to support herself? And a family? Narcissa suddenly envisioned Andromeda surrounded by a slew of brats, and had to shake her head to go back to the present discussion. Scars.
“Maybe you needed a reminder! You seemed so stupid, keep going back; continually disobeying Father. And I may be pretty but my head does not bobble about with a plastic smile. I know what’s expected and what’s needed and what’s right and I make my choices from there. You make your choices of some unconceivable notion of rebellion. What good could come from it!?” She demanded, her voice growing shrill. She had no response to the idea her sister posed; why would she? Tolerance was not in her vocabulary. They didn’t annoy and pester her, mudbloods were disintegrating the wizarding world; damaging the gene pools irreversibly. Perhaps they needed more of the ‘inbreeding’ Andromeda criticized so easily- hadn’t it produced her?
It wasn’t the worlds that caused the tears to well up and poor down the blonde’s cheeks. They hardly mattered to her, as they were quite wrong and unfounded. She hadn’t even caught all of the ones flung her way. However, she did father that Andi had made her choices, and viewed Narcissa as a weakling puppet forever to be played like a pretty doll. At least, that’s what she thought her sister’s snapping words had meant. But anyways, it was the tone; the anger that resonated through her loud voice that made Cissa cringe and began to cry. Never once had Andi taken such a violent voice towards Cissa. She was the well meaning sister, the baby sister, the needy sister. Never the one to be growled and glared and snarled at. Never.
Cissa had opened her mouth once again to defend herself, or give another sad plea for her sister to come back; she wasn’t sure which words would tumble out past her lips faster. However, Andromeda’s words stopped her in her tracks. She let them sink in, the lead weight curling into a ball in her stomach and raising a feeling of revolt within. If it hadn’t be completely unladylike she may have very well gagged.
“You’ve been whoring yourself out like a common street slut to a mudblood?” She snarled, wiping at her previously streaming eyes. They were dry and narrowed now, in disgust and in anger. “Sinking yourself to that level, I can’t believe you. Did you kiss mother and father with that mouth?” She demanded, her lips curling in a sneer. Whatever sisterly longing she’d had moments ago was lost, or deeply buried. If there was one thing Narcissa despised more than mudbloods, it was those who slept with those who were not their husbands. And Andromeda was guilty of all of the above.
“Perhaps you’re right, Andromeda. You’ve made your hell-bound decisions.” She said in her best cold and unemotional voice. She’d worked for ages on it, in front of the mirror. She’d never dreamed she’d use it on her Andi; Bella maybe, but never Andi. “You’ve been very apt to allow the connections to be cut; I can’t imagine I’d be able to get a husband knowing my former sister was out whoring herself to filth and producing filth bastards. Good day, Andromeda. And good bye.” She turned on her heal, trying her best to stay cold and calculating. Don’t think that it’s Andi, her inner voice drilled. But even with her lip digging into her bottom lip she couldn’t help the small tear that welled in the corner of her eye and slid down her cheek bone. But she could ignore it.
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